Surrender

A broken strap, 

She holds her breasts back.

Boys check her like a meat

Though she gets back to the beat.



Running late for Work

She jumps onto the first bus

Heels waking up the office

She trembles to the notice

Walking sideways 

Avoiding occupied bays

She acted like a Novice.


Eyes rummaging her sanctity,

Was it her number or singularity?

Walking into that cabin,

She heard herself shuddering.

Of Colleagues, Seniors & House Keeping

She hunted for that perfect hiding.

She ruffled her fears & made the noise

People called it Impatience', she called it Voice.

Her neat notes, her loyalty

Her presentations maintained anonymity,

Her hardships turned pale

Fake concern in charity?

Day 2 of her life:

Waiting by the bus stop

She brushes her nails

Sharpens them actually

Hair untucked to neckline,

Bag transferred to front,

She chooses a darker Subway.

A day older,

She thinks she's smarter,

Finding a Blouse that's looser

She pushes the Red lipstick to last drawer...

Walking by the widest street

She decodes the reality,

It's neither her degree

Nor the sanity

It's not even her spirits

Never her popularity

Her existence was the trigger

Her curls, her blusher

She understood her waters

Indeed,

It is the shirt that matters.

- A Girl at Work

Abandoned

Born to happiness

Raised to pride

Every boat sailed to tide

Creators smiled

Watched every mile!

The algae was slimy

The fishes, too horny

They’d hit the boat

Danced with Mr. Toad

Teenage on board!

Spilling water washed the edges

The boat was assured –

There’ll be more sledges

Gap gushed, heart choked

Boat sighed, God is one Bloke!

Storm subsides, boat revives

Finds a way back, every hope alive

Neither grasped a breath

Nor focused on death.

The Homeland was grave

The fishes played naïve

Mr. Toad lied upside

Creators were barely in sight

Was there any word like ‘Demise?’

A decade long tale

None bothers,

None remembers,

An abandoned boat descends

Every second is a deep slumber!

Life starts with the coffee and muffin, passes by cherry and yoghurt, dances along cheddar and wine, but eventually aborts when the night is on. Life is dead that night – Kaida!

Gore

Enough to the core,

Mornings are buttered in gore

The thorns are just acting out on the fence,

Although they were plugged for defense

Wind is just scaring the hell out

Never thought it will spit and doubt

Rains were good, they were in thoughts

The water tricked, as salt barged ​

​Bittering the bond, the wounds aroused

The blacks and blues perch by the life

Elfing the hope, they never leave the house​

​

I say, where's kind, bleeding in the swing

Stop pushing, the bonds just sting​

Of Doors, & Latches

Door ajar, wind afar

Cacophony of whispers

Aroused to the ink

Insomniac dawn,

Words in power

Pollen with papers

Barely rolled up,

Bland way ahead

Scarcity of thoughts

Heart shifts in drought

Hill in the window

Sun stapled perfectly

Tiny dewdrops, I say

Where’s my cuppa tea

It’s just another hangover!

Mundaneness

Just walking in the rain

Eyes fluttered with water & grain

Fear to filthiness, cheer to craziness

Life is broad, I am the happiness.

Water washes the spots

Gods tinkle the blots

Ruining the bad dream

I could still join the dots

Moon pays the pence

Cloud shook the fence

Candle roared in defence

Read my lips, 

another day on commence!

The Ganges’ Kick

Water was Fiend, made me pretend

Life went draught, when water came in tent

Shoes got wet, and feet would suspend

A stroke of betrayal, rivers came to a bend,

Love & death, got the distance apart

A rising morning and water came to heart

Chucked in elegance, Fight, Fight, Fight!

Broken Dreams, and a crumbled house

Days of distraction, an hour to arouse,

The Ganges was roaring, throat stumbled

Paddled to the past, rapids washed the grumble

Heart in mouth and then I’d never bumble,

Tides laughed, mocked at the attitude

Said, ‘Live it loud, kick away the solitude’

A million-times hit, the Ganges flowed in honour

Scared me, Washed me, memories took a corner.

Rolling back with bliss, I felt the life

The holy Ghats, and there was another fright

He promised to sail, bowed with all might

Broken heart mixed with the rocks, bones got tight

Alibi of the Goddess, barren land retook the flight.

Karma Tonic: Chapter 36: Cage on Pyre

Cavern of melancholy, raging for ages

Rummaging in sleep, fate in cages

Frightened to live, still heart blazes

Hunting for warmth, spending old wages.

A traitor to love, chopped in phases

Look at the barbaric reality, killing solemn muses.

Is darkness tired, is morning ready?

Stop that pyre on fire,

Oh you desire, stop being so steady!

Cage on pyre

Karma Tonic: Chapter 35: Incomplete

Locked to Oblivion

That husky voice

That fear, that choice

Enchanting persona that would take away my voice,

The name was ‘Daddy’

He sparked with no vice,

A bright ride in gypsy, and my soul was in slice!

Time grew, and came along,

'A dare to read between the lines,

A chance to love and revise',

When the pole dropped and then,

 ‘Incomplete Dice’

She held me fine, when her womb almost cried,

She kicked the pain, oh my ears almost dried!

My mindless inkling, to sniff, to smile

Teenage rumbling, still her warmth made it right.

Ghosts riding in the night, while her clutch was utterly tight

None could pull me, none could fright

Rainbows every weekend, till I felt it was alright!

When the train backed off the tracks, chuckled,

‘Incomplete Flight’

Karma Tonic: Chapter 34: Betrayal

“Life is short. From here to that old car you know so well there is a stretch of twenty, twenty-five paces. It is a very short walk. Make those twenty-five steps. Now. Right now. Come just as you are. And we shall live happily ever after. ”

— Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita

A woman goes to an astrologer with a crippled heart and a scattered life. She meddles with her horoscope, and passes it to the astrologer. The astrologer stares at it for long and puffs his remaining breath onto the table. Mutters to himself and looks up the woman. He speaks for the first time, 'What do you want to know'? The woman repeats her demand in broken, unorganized syllables, 'Is this ever gonna stop'? The astrologer opens a huge flow chart with various houses of planets, popping in & popping out. He circles three houses in red and looks up at the woman with stern scrutiny, and questions 'What do you survive on.' She clears her throat and says , 'Well, I am a dancer'. The astrologer answers, 'Then go on with it. Don't try to look back, because there's nothing waiting for you back there. Don't look ahead, there's scarcely any light to see the route. Just go on with what you are doing and let the game finish on its own'. The woman appallingly gapes at the astrologer and asks, 'But, that's not an answer to my question! Why not have some normalcy to mundane things? I can certainly change things for myself. I have a heart that is brimming with love, courage that can fight any troupe to protect that love, loyalty that can shake the neighbour's dog and strength that can forgive my own murderer. I'll beat myself black and blue to be loved. I'll let go every fear to enter that dark route. Then why not'? 

Astrologer replies, 'Betrayal follows you'. 

A Story: Take Me Home,Bounty Roads

“I was dead, then alive. 

Weeping, then laughing. 

The power of love came into me, and I became fierce like a lion, 

then tender like the evening star.”  

- Rumi

Four months at NCC Camp, was an exile chosen by her, away from home, in the freezing Delhi Military Area, turned her pale to yellow & callow life. A 13-year old: face that looked Chinese, forehead that looked like grafted from a man, she was returning home after a prideful journey of defense life. The most infamous talkative, turned silent, as if waiting for the storm. Train was rumbling faster to hit at the scheduled time, noisier to shake the anxious guts, while limbo followed everyone's faces. Her face too was getting ridiculous and threatening, as the train moved further.

The fellow cadets were hugging each other, marking sweet goodbyes, exchanging souvenirs and making promises to meet again. But she was lost in her own world, as if someone held her soul and she’s just hanging onto the clutch. She got up suddenly and walked towards the door. She seemed like she was in her deepest slumber, as she footed on the train's door. Few assumed that she'd slip, others watched out of eagerness with a fear that she'd jump. The wind moved swiftly, following and foreseeing the tracks, she stared intently at the missing poles, as if they said something, each time she passed. The train wheels switched the tracks, giving a slight goose pinch to the crowd. The fellow mates got tensed, few called out her name, though nobody dared to come close to her. The train had already entered the junction yet to slow down. The instructor, still tied up with his mind, whether, to rush or hush others, looks bewilderingly unclear. Casting the die, a moment next, avoiding the stiffened circle around him, the instructor hurried towards the door to get hold of the girl. The frantic steps froze when he realised that the girl had already jumped off the train. 

“I want you always to remember me. Will you remember that I existed, and that I stood next to you here like this?” 

The appalled faces, let out themselves from windows and doors, in fear and disgust. Few ran to the door, few screamed vaguely. Most of them looked like they lost their toes during sleep.The girl's body was loosely hanging there. She was hanging in her father’s neck, hugging and kissing him, crying and hugging back. It looked like a valley of heaven, a grandeur of love, as if they were meeting after many worlds and oceans had walked past them!

Jo bhi pyaar se mila, hum ussi ke ho liye

Karma Tonic: Chapter 19: Getting the shoes together!

A hiccup dedicated to all those people, who have been dealing with my shoe obsessions :)

My shoe rack stays in my knit box

Night & day with all colours of flip flops

Blue, yellow & mauve

Silver is always too suave

Aah, the brass and gold

Even if my feet is cold

I’ll wear them to my shower rides

And walk them into the jazzy nights

One after the other, the colours grew greedy

I’d pay from my nose for it, unless there’s some needy

While I lose the count, mom pleads,

“You’d tan those ankles, as the sun bleeds”

Hence, begins a new obsession of canvas

The canvas that flashed paints of innocence

Purple, pink & green

Laces that hung till I fell on my spleen

Running by the pebbles of lake

Soaking by the tides of beach

Climbing by the hoods of camel

One after the other,

Jazz of canvas played hither thither

Mommy smiled and sneaked out few

Gave them to little girls with a phew

Replaced colours with all the dues

I pretended that I didn’t knew

She believed that ‘I am cute’

And the life was always in hues

With all colours, right there in my shoes!